


Phasma's Huggalumps and Snoke's Doodles

by ImperialRemnant



Series: Shenanigans of the Force Kind [21]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2015-12-05
Packaged: 2018-05-05 01:38:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5356112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImperialRemnant/pseuds/ImperialRemnant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux and Phasma show their love for Kylo by disobeying Snoke's orders. Kylo stays behind to help Snoke with the rancor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Phasma's Huggalumps and Snoke's Doodles

**Author's Note:**

> Lots of thanks to Ally (creepy-scarlet-witch.tumblr.com) for naming the rancor xD

Reaching the edge of the forest, knowing the clearing would be right through the trees, Hux stopped them.

“There’s nothing wrong with us holding hands!” Kylo insisted, refusing to let go. The sap.

“It’s not that! I need to,” Hux sighed, looking at the ground, “I need to give back your music box.”

“What? No, you keep it,” Kylo told him, but he let go of the General’s hand.

“I can’t keep it, Kylo,” Hux said, looking back up. He hated looking at the mask and not his face.

Phasma also let go of his hand, so Hux reached into his coat and-

“Huh. I must’ve left it on the shuttle,” Hux said, when he realised his pockets were empty except for some lint.

“Great! Don’t give it back,” Kylo told him, stern, “I gave it to you for a reason.”

“What, that it symbolised your heart?” Hux asked, “What does that even _mean_?”

“It means what he says it means,” Phasma said, “Now come on, my little huggalumps.”

“Hugga _what_?” Hux asked, but neither replied and instead walked into the clearing. Hux stood rooted on the spot for a moment, too confused to move. He brought himself to his senses, shaking his head, continuing after them.

* * *

“What do you mean the shuttle was stolen?” Hux asked, infuriated.

He was kinda cute when he was angry, Kylo thought, but right now _wasn’t_ the time to think that. Rey and Finn had stolen the shuttle. The shuttle Hux left the music box on.

“General ya better stand down, or it ain’t gonna be pretty,” Snoke said, “I let ya go once, don’t think I’m one to give second chances.”

“It’s okay, Hux,” Kylo told him, he was standing right behind him, only needing to whisper to be heard, “Just leave it.”

“But your music box!” Hux exclaimed, turning to face him, no issue with keeping his voice _not_ a whisper.

Snoke didn’t seem interested, going back to yelling at the troopers to make sure the rancor was as smashed as a Corellian Smuggler.

Hux looked furious.

Kylo put his hand on his shoulder, Hux shrugging it away. “I’ll be back,” Hux gritted through his teeth, then running off into the forest.

“What? General! It’s not that important!” Kylo tried to yell after him.

“Scuse me,” Phasma said, also running off.

“Phasma!” Kylo yelled, but she disappeared into the trees too, after Hux.

“Don’t ya dare go anywhere Kylo,” Snoke said, “I need your help here.”

Kylo sighed.

* * *

Running, spotting Hux, Phasma skidded to a stop, nearly hurtling straight into the General.

“Where do you think we should go?” Phasma asked, “To the Resistance base?”

“They must be somewhere,” Hux said, then he just stood around, not doing anything, like he was trying to sense which way to go.

Did he have _force abilities_? Phasma wondered. That was an absurd thought.  

Finally, Hux dialled his Lieutenants demanding information.

“I ordered trackers to be placed on all vehicles,” Hux growled into his comm.

“They must’ve disconnected it, sir,” was the reply, a woman.

Hux closed his eyes, mouthing what appeared to be numbers. Counting. Ah yes, the best way to handle anger: Close your eyes and count slowly to ten.

Perhaps he had been to anger management, Phasma figured. That would explain a lot.

When Hux opened his eyes, he addressed his comm, “Lieutenant, send me the coordinates of the Resistance base-,”

“But sir!”

“Now! Lieutenant. Do it right now. Tell His Greatness I will not be there to help with his rancor. _However_ , if I find anything worth of note about the Resistance and can get a message to you I will do so.”

“And inform him I will not be there either,” Phasma said, “I will be with the General.”  
“Yes General, yes Captain, it will be done at once,” The Lieutenant said.

Hux cut the call, a moment later the coordinates of the Resistances whereabouts were sent.

“Well, they’re not far,” Hux said, walking.

Phasma followed.

“Would you like to play a game, sir?” Phasma asked, looking around at the trees, “I’d say _I Spy_ but that’s quite limited. I mean, I spy with my little eye something green. Well plants, obviously.”

“No, not at all Captain, we’re on a serious mission,” Hux said.

“Yes, to get Kylo’s music box. The most important thing to the First Order. Top priority,” no callousness was found in her tone, more an amusement. Besides, she was going with Hux, wasn’t she? A bit hypocritical if she were rude about it.

Hux said nothing. Always such a great conversationalist.

“Maybe we could play Bed, Wed, Behead,” Phasma said, “With the Resistance trio!”

“ _No_ , Phasma,” Hux said, “Besides, wasn’t it _Wed_ , _Bed_ , Behead?”

“Does it matter? If not with Finn, Rey and Dameron. Then maybe... Leia Organa, Luke Skywalker and Han Solo?”

“Captain if you don’t shut up I will order you to head back.”

“I’d like to see you try, you haven’t even got a blaster.”

“What? I do... where in the spice mines did it go!? Oh force dammit!”

* * *

Perhaps the rancor could use a name, Kylo thought. He starred at it in its cage, much like he had with Rivana. If he had access to a library, he’d find out all he could about rancors. What to feed it, how to keep it calm.

Although he was getting very drunk, so perhaps there was a different procedure.

“Does the rancor have a name, sir?” Kylo asked Snoke, looking at the Supreme Leader.

“Well, it’s not like I’d get an animal without naming it,” Snoke said, “It doesn’t have a name _yet_. I was thinking of something beginning with... D...”

“Why D sir?” Kylo asked.

Snoke didn’t answer, concentrating far too hard, “Duu-. No...Doooo-.”

“Doodles,” Kylo said.

Snoke barked with laughter, hitting Kylo on the back, “Kylo, you’ve done it again! Keep this up and I’ll forget our little spat!”

Kylo smiled, “Doodles is a great name sir.”

Doodles let out a drunken roar.

Rivana snapped playfully at Kylo’s fingers. “Hey girl,” He gave her a pat on the head, she purred.

“She’s taken a liking to you,” Snoke said bitterly, looking away and sniffing loudly. “Wonder if there’s any more alcohol?”

“They need to be looked after right,” Kylo said, “Or they won’t take a particular liking to you. Animals can be quite clever,” Kylo looked down at the dark lizard, its red eyes wide, “especially ones so powerful in the darkside of the force.”

“Well a rancor is hardly that,” Snoke said.

“Hardly, but they’re large and deadly.”

Snoke side-eyed Kylo with a glare, but said nothing.

One trooper came over, “Sir, the rancor is suitably drunk.”

Kylo stood up taller, voice once again changing to a child-like one, “Tutu?”

Snoke smiled now too, “Yes, fetch the tutu!” 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave a review and/or kudos!


End file.
